2 Words...Potty Training.

Where do I even start with this topic? Maybe how I got this brilliant idea to start it? Well, I am ashamed to tell you that it all began because I did not want to be THAT Mom who was the last to potty train their child. No seriously. Potty training is really all about me ya know. But really though. Before we started the potty thing, she would tell me at Target wearing her diapers that she had to potty and I would tell her that we didn't have time, just go in your diaper. I know, Mom of the year right here. Also I am the one who would be doing 99% of the training and that alone is super scary and overwhelming so who wants to do that?? I came up with so many excuses as to when we would start and why she wasn't ready but the only problem was me. We are in gymnastics class with several kids around the same age as Rowan and I noticed a little girl not much older than her come in with undies on. So I began to fish around about how old was the child, how did they do, and was it as awful as everyone says. I really asked every single parent I ran into from then on. You could call me the potty investigator. Haha. Then one day a little boy came into class and his mother mentioned that they were "commando" and potty training. So now and BOY and a GIRL were trained before my child? How can this be? I asked her how she started and she said that she was reading the "Oh, Crap" book and it was working. I immediately went home and Googled it, bought it for my iPad and told myself I am going to start potty training....soon. That was Wednesday. I look at my calendar and start to pick out dates to start....and I can't find a single date that gives me 3 days at home. Crazy huh? I am a stay at home mom and I can't find 3 days at home. Weird. I mean trips to Target count right? If you know me, shhh MOM don't say anything, you can't tell me nothing. I can do it and I will do it, my own way and I will make a way.

So Friday comes along and after sitting down to read "Oh, Crap" I figured now is the best time, even though we are leaving for Minnesota the following weekend, she will already be trained by then right? Pants came off Friday at 3pm. Literally. As I  start to read it, I feel like this is just a guide and so I start to skim further into the book to find what I really need to know since I clearly know everything already. Haha. For the first few times at the potty, she did great! She peed like a champ! I couldn't believe it! And I kept thinking, well we are done right? That was easy. Not so fast. We got the pee part down but what about the poop? I kept her in dresses with no undies on because I am not going to look like a "bad mom" and let my child run around naked outside. Remember this is all about me :) No poop on Day 1, surely it would be coming on Day #2. Yep, it came alright. Outside by her swing set in the grass and she was so proud! Ok, at least it was outside so it was easy clean up. Thanks kid. If that was the worst thing, we are still surviving pretty well. Day #3. Because I know everything and do not follow advice until I am desperate, I never stayed home with her to train her because who has time for that? I was anxious as heck and I now know where every bathroom is in every place I go! Off to Nana's she went. This mama needed a break and Nana was also graced with a turd outside too :) Haha. The dogs have taught her well. Day #4, me alone with her again while daddy worked. She was awake for a hot minute until I smelled poop. This time it was not so convenient. Caught up in her skin tight jammie's....into the tub she went. 8:00 am, and outfit change #1 not sure why but I decided to put shorts on her with no undies today instead of a dress, but I did. Maybe because I assumed she had this pee thing down. I Let her play outside for a minute and saw a small puddle of water on my deck? Hmmm Rowan what is that? I peed. Seriously? Yep, so back inside for pants change #2. Go back to what I am doing and come back outside to another small puddle next to the first one....ummm what is that? Did the dog mark her territory and pee too? Nope. Outfit change #3. Oh man, it is only 8:30 am and I am loosing this battle hard! It is not even 9am and I want to hit up a patio for a glass of wine!! So sheepishly I pulled out that book that I thought I didn't need and skimmed right for the get my child to poop chapter and why all of a sudden is she regressing!!! HELP ME!! After the book calmed me down, I put her back into a dress without undies. I felt a sense of defeat. I finally broke down and made a stupid sticker chart that everyone said to do while thinking this is a waste of time and not worth it but let me tell you, she loves to put that sticker up like "look at me". We were fighting for the control and she was winning and she knew it. We had no problems the rest of the day but we can not get this poop thing down.

Sooooo what do Mom's do when we want our kids to do something?? We bribe them, well at least I do :) Since the whole "let your poop go swimming" thing wasn't working and I thought I better find another term since it was the start of pool season and I do NOT want to be the one that makes everyone clear the pool due to a floating turd. The sticker chart wasn't working for poop, I had to think of something she really wanted. Oh, I know. A crab. Yes, you heard me right. My 2.5 year old wants a hermit crab thanks to the mall kiosk where she has to hold one every single time we go. BINGO! "Ok Rowan, you poop in the potty and we will go to the mall and you can get a hermit crab and bring it home." Literally the next morning, she pooped on the potty before gymnastics and immediately said, "let's go get the crab." Oh crap. She remembered. A deal is a deal.

We are now the proud owners of Daisy the hermit crab and also I am a sucker because she still won't poop in the toilet. It is either in her pants or outside. WHY WHY WHY! I am a pretty open person when it comes to talking about bathroom habits and I can't imagine her feeling embarrassed about it. I even make up stupid songs like "poo poo in the potty" and sing them to her! LOL

As for that Minnesota trip, it was a 36 hour weekend for a wedding that Rowan was the flower girl for! Imagine my terror when I realized we had to drive 4 hours with her and I had to let her walk down the isle with no underwear on....I really really contemplated putting a diaper back on her for that 30 minutes. But I didn't. We took the potty in the car and let her use it when she had to go, which was twice. I put a puppy training pad on her car seat to catch any accidents that may occur. Best idea ever, even though we didn't need it :) We only had 1 poo accident and 1 potty incident. Not too shabby for all of that travel and craziness! She walked down the isle like a pro and we have decided that she makes such a cute flower girl, we will now be renting her out for weddings :)

Well we are on day 14 and we are still working on it. We have the pee down, it's the crap I can't handle. Time to pick up the book again as now I see where the title came from. Very clever. As for the bribe, well Daisy the hermit crab was eaten by our Goldendoodle :( I am currently working on my next bribe! I just keep telling myself, it will happen, she will do it....and I am still waiting.

All I know is that I have some great photos and stories to tell her when she is older about how potty training went and what is better that making memories and remembering how we all survived! Again, people with more that 1 child....you are seriously all saints!

Cheers! Yes I will be having a glass of wine :)